How I learned to let go

When I worked full time in the corporate world, I had a bit of a catchphrase I used when I was discussing 'real life' things with colleagues. When someone was being hard on themselves for missing a deadline, or guilt-tripping over forgetting their child had a mufti day at school, I'd step in with my line "ah, so you're a little bit rubbish at everything, welcome to the club". It was meant as a light-hearted way to show empathy and support, to let them know they weren't alone, we're all just muddling through. And it wasn't a lie.

Regardless of where you are in life, there are so many things that need attention something quite literally has to give. You are destined to occasionally be a little bit rubbish in some area of your life. At that time, I had forced myself to accept that I was going to drop the ball sometimes - it wasn't great but it was the best I could do. What it took me a while to work out was that I could do more than simply feel guilty and accept my fate.

The joy of outsourcing

First was the nanny. It felt extravagant, but with older kids who refused to go to after-school care, there was little choice. And let me tell you, the first night I came home after work and the nanny had done the washing, folding it so carefully it looked like it had been ironed, I cried. I kid you not, tears. Over washing.

As work, life and kids moved on for me, things changed. My favourite human became Colin, the amazing man who came in and did our ironing every week. To be clear, he was probably my husband's favourite human too. It felt excessive, but here's the reality. For every hour I was paying Colin to iron, I wasn't. Instead I was putting more time into my work, my family, my friends and even myself.

While I didn't think twice about outsourcing to skilled professionals in my working life, it had taken me a little longer to sit comfortably with bringing the same philosophy into my personal life. As my life stage changed, so did the outsourced skills I engaged to help me stay on track. I'm so grateful I was more in tune with the concept, as I was soon to face an extremely challenging example of it.

From overwhelm to relief through outsourcing

After both of my parents passed away, my brother, sister and I had the daunting task of sorting through our family home to prepare it for sale. I've moved home almost every two years my entire adult life, so in one way, I was ready for the task ahead. However this was a move like no other. We grew up in a home full of love - and things. Our parents lived through the depression, a time where 'waste not, want not' was a way of life. They had carefully held onto so many things, from books to blankets, toys to telephones (I counted 5). This wasn't a chaotic hoarding scenario, this was simply the evidence of lives well lived. Nevertheless, there were antiques, heirlooms and junk - 60 years worth all mixed in together.

Try as we might, almost 6 months after we began the process of clearing our family home, we had made a negligible difference. There was simply so much to go through - it was overwhelming and extremely stressful, and we were all still grieving - we were quite frankly in crisis. It was obvious there was no way we could do this ourselves, after much discussion, we investigated what it would look like to outsource. We researched, debated whether we could continue to do the work ourselves, and finally settled on a firm to come in and have a conversation with us about how they could help. The conversation led to a quote, more debate, and finally and agreement. For me, there was an instant sense of relief when we signed that contract.

Yet again, outsourcing proved to be a life saver. Enlisting the help of a firm who primarily service clients readying their own or a family member's home prior to sale was a revelation. They came in and supported us as we made decisions around what we wanted to keep, what was ready for sale or donation, and what needed to be disposed of. In a week the house was clear - it was simply astonishing.

That big daunting task was made infinitely less daunting, and more achievable, by bringing in a team of professionals. With the property emptied, then came the painter, the cleaners and the gardener - all services we typically don't think twice about outsourcing when we have a significant task to achieve and are time poor. Why then do we question ourselves when we outsource a less traditional service?

Finding inspiration from experience

Not only did we have the house cleared, tidied and ready for sale in one month, the experience inspired me on a much deeper level. It was the impetus for me to launch my own company, Really Organised helping people gain control of their environment so the crisis level situation never eventuates.

It is now my absolute privilege to guide and support people in curating their physical environment as the stages of their lives inevitably change. There is such freedom in focusing on the things that we value, letting them shine in our homes and personal life. The impact is significant, life changing even. By outsourcing reducing the 'stuff', and getting help creating systems and processes that help your environments better service your needs, you not only create physical space, but mental space. It is a catalyst for calm rather than that ever increasing sense of overwhelm. Let me help. Because nobody needs to feel like they're 'a little bit rubbish'.